I Don’t Know What To Do With My Life
Comments (0) I suspect I’m not alone in this either. I’ve been working on and off for the last decade, and I’ve absolutely hated just about every job I’ve had. I don’t want to go back to school, because one of the small joys of life is not going to school. I’m not good enough to be an actual writer. Not charismatic or funny enough to try filming myself in skits. Not talented enough to do any number of things. It sort of sucks that my two favorite things (writing and history) have almost no way of paying the bills.
I look day after day in the classifieds, and basically what I see are a bunch of jobs that I have no interest in. It’s not just a matter of pay either, I’m more then used to surviving at 7 bucks an hour. It’s a matter of being somewhat happy at a fulfilling job for once. I realize a good number of people are unhappy with where they are working. Hell, just about everyone I’ve worked with has been unhappy with where they were at. The two jobs I liked I actually managed to get along with the guys I was working with. Of course the one job my best friend left the job and it got boring. My other job they decided that they were going to make everyone part time, or you could take a severance package. So I left.
My reason for writing this isn’t to whine. I just feel like I’m not the only one sort of floating out there in the sea of unknown. I think there’s a lot of people out there like me. I’d love to hear from you and your thoughts. Or feel free to call me a loser asshole and pathetic, I’m not exactly picky. I think it also helps that I was a bit brighter in my life then my dad, who spent most of his 20s doing drugs and being an alcoholic. He only got married because he got my mom pregnant. I’m pretty sure it worked that way for all my uncles on that side of the family.
It just seems that there should be something more to our lives then just survival. I just seem lost out in the world, without any idea what to do other then survive. Just being a cog in the system and doing something I hate just doesn’t feel like it’s cutting it anymore. It’s like we went to school just to train us how to work a shit job and not question authority. It’s probably my own fault. I probably should have went to college and gotten a useless degree in something or another while taking my time to get it. In the long run one of the probably bad decisions I’ve made in my life. Sometimes I wonder what life would have been like if I never dated that crazy girl from Jersey. That choice was one of those first ones that in my mind I wonder what if?
