Posts tagged: TGWTG

Why the Nostalgia Critic Retired

By , September 16, 2012 2:38 am

If I inspired this type of stupidity and no talent hacks who thought they could act, I would retire too. This first guy might take the cake:

All of the wonders of TGWTG rolled into a ball of awful whiteness. If you can make it through this 7 minute video, your more insane then me, because I stopped 2 minutes in. This guy is stalking you, Doug Walker.

I think this guy wants to eat you, Nostalgia Critic. Either that or he’s one of Saun Fausz’s relatives who is sad that that fat ass might actually have to get a real job. You mean Doug Walker might not hire this guy to be in his new series? He apparently will be able to cry at the drop of a hat, so he’s got that going for him.

Continue reading 'Why the Nostalgia Critic Retired'»

How Not To Manage Your Brand

By , July 13, 2012 5:28 pm

So lately I’ve been watching some of the TGWTG rejects, like the film renegado, Demoversei, Horror guru and  blockbuster buster… Wait, Blockbuster Buster is actually a part of TGWTG? They are getting desperate. Once you let in someone like blockbuster buster, your basically opening the door for all the other half ass Nostalgia Critic ripoffs. I mean at least at one point they were bringing in people who had original and unique content.

But that’s not really the reason I’m writing. It’s more how I’m amazed that watching these videos that some of the TGWTG will show up in ANYTHING. Look, I realize they aren’t on the level of internet fame as the Nostalgia Critic, but even I have better knowledge of how to manage a brand. I don’t even have a brand really, unless you somehow count the Failure Experiment as a “brand”.

But these people, especially Obscurus Lupa, Damanda Hagan and Phelous show up in almost all these videos. At some point you have to wonder why? Look, you show up in someone’s video once, maybe it’s something special or a one time event. But when you show up over and over, whats the point? Your not going to suddenly make a new fan of you out of a fan from someone else cause you appear in 5 of their videos. If you can’t get them on the first try it’s probably not worth it.

Secondly when you show up in all these videos it just cheapens yourself. It looks bad when your watching all these TGWTG rejects and keep seeing the same faces from the actual TGWTG. If your a random viewer or watching a few of those rejects for laughs, it just gives the impression that they are just as bad. In the long run when you show up in all these cheesy crappy video reviewers show, it seems like you are just as low as them. I mean really, how often do you see Nostalgia Critic or any of the TGWTG “Big guns” showing up in cameos? There’s a reason, they know better.

It’s funny, cause if I was in charge of TGWTG and actually cared about their brand (which they obviously don’t) I’d be keeping them to a limited number of cameos not just for these outside reviewers, but even reviewers within the TGWTG family. It’s like they don’t even understand that it cheapens the whole band by basically doing every possible cameo they can.

But what do I know, it’s not like I make any money. Or that anyone cares what I say.

Review of Revolution of the Mask 2

By , April 27, 2012 3:53 pm

In my previous posts (here and here) I reviewed Issue 1 of Revolution of the Mask, a comic created by Linkara who is well known on the internet for his comic reviews. Basically he just bashes the hell out of comics that were good in their day but horrible in retrospect, or nitpicks everything. There’s a saying that those who can not do, teach. Well then, in Linkara’s case those who can not do and can not teach, review. The sad thing about RotM is that the idea is interesting, but everything else about it falls horribly flat. So let’s dive into Issue 2.

Page 2 and 3

Not much really going on here as the heroes and Gamma (our narrator) are flying through the air. Gamma is of course a little put off by this, considering he is hundreds of feet in the air and the only reason he isn’t falling is because he is in Rorschach’s arms. I’d be a tad paranoid too. He asks them who they are, and after a stupid line (we’re the lawmakers and lawbreakers?!?!?) Eighth Wonder says they are Superheros. We also get the subtitle (apparently) of this issue, Secret Wars. Why the cover doesn’t have this subtitle is beyond me, or why the previous issue didn’t have one either.

Page 4 and 5

So the heroes land in some ruined city, and they get Gamma’s name again. They mention that a Gamma designation working in a network information facility (I’m willing to bet now that we are never informed exactly what a network information facility actually is) is a janitor or a censor. He admits he was a censor and had heard about drug addicts and maniacs he believed they were. Rorschach mentions that Superheroes are masked crime fighters, wearing masks because they value their secret identity.

Page 6 and 7

Gamma is just as confused as the rest of us, and asks what is going on. 8th wonder tells dusk to go bring the newbie up to date. That pretty much sums up page 6, which is horrible because page 7 is even worse. We get to see another female superhero do a bunch of bouncing around pretending to attack something (oh and one panel of a gratuitous crotch shot). She informs another superhero that it’s her own martial art called “Joyous Buttkicking” and that she’s looking for Templar.

I know I don’t want to bash the art too much in this, but the woman doing the bouncing around has the most horrible logo. It’s a JJ, but it doesn’t match all the other ink in the scene. It looks as though someone used photoshop afterwards to put it in, and that it wasn’t originally there. It’s disconcerting to look at and really stands out. Somehow 8th Wonder’s logo is fine, but not the JJ. I don’t get it.

Page 8 and 9

Gamma is brought by Dusk to meet Templar, who is a hero in a suit of armor. He also appears to be the librarian in a rather large library. Despite the large collection of textbooks and rather large looking books, instead Gamma is given comic books to read. Because apparently “The All” banned comic books because they glorified individuality. But that Gamma has never even seen a comic before is odd. It wouldn’t be impossible to create comic books that are simple propaganda for The All. It’s a medium that The All could be using to take advantage of the people. Hell I think there’s Islamist Jihadists who actually use propaganda in comics.

Okay, so everything up to this point I wrote not too long after the original review. The problem is that the comic is so dam boring, there’s almost nothing to mock/parody in it. It’s really not even worth a review. If you were wondering why “Revolution of the Mask pt. 3″ never came out, it’s because it’s an awful comic. There is almost no action and a lot of talking.  Oh and Linkara’s idea of foreshadowing is smacking you over the head with a sledgehammer.

So we get a story about how the Superheros came to be, and it’s really dumb. They went into a city to collect resources for The All. They found comics but The All banned them. So they decide to escape back into the city, claim that they were dieing because bio-warfare had been used on the city and that they were going to blow up. A few explosions later and they laid low for a bit, before going back out into the world as Superheros.

Somehow The All never puts 2+2 together and realizes that these terrorists that are De-stabilizing it’s regime are the same people who disappeared into the ruins of the old city. Are there no airplanes or helicopters in this world? Why can’t someone do a flyover and just bomb the city into ruins? Or why hasn’t surveillance captured them flying in the direction of this city? Is The All only worried about the Superheros when they are causing trouble for it?

During all this we also find out what Linkara thinks is a superhero. Basically a good two shoes, because apparently he hates the idea of an Anti-Hero. Or more likely lacks the ability to write an Anti-Hero that doesn’t cross the line. I suspect his idea of an anti-hero is someone who rapes a lot of woman but is still a good guy.

Finally there’s a conversation between wannabe Rorsach and another guy whose name is never mentioned. But it’s already obvious that the guy is going to be the one that betrays the rest of the superheros. Why is it so obvious? Cause he’s the ONLY person critical of “8th Wonder” plan for action now, and pointing out that rescuing 1 person from The All doesn’t exactly win the war for them.

The comic ends with a page dedicated to the HQ of the Aligarchy. In a scene lifted from V For Vendetta there’s also a little girl graffiting “Free For All” on a random wall. Another message that doesn’t make sense, shouldn’t it instead say “Free From All”? Finally it ends with Omega reading quite possibly the worst comic ever, “Abstract Man”.

Even though I only spent 60 something cents on this, I can’t recommend it. The only good parts of the last one were the scenes lifted from other sources. This one rarely has even that saving grace. Go read this story pretty much done better by either 1984 or V For Vendetta. Hell even Brave New World is a better read, and they didn’t lift anything from that. But it wouldn’t surprise me if that was due to Linkara never reading BNW (they haven’t made a comic of it).

Failure Experiment – Why the 2012 Kids Choice Awards Sucked

By , April 2, 2012 7:15 pm

Actually a parody of Angry Joe’s rant about the 2009 VGA show:

http://angryjoeshow.com/2009/12/why-spikes-video-game-awards-suck-balls/

Blistered Thumbs: Our Staffing is Questionable

By , March 1, 2012 4:24 am

This is Blistered Thumbs staff: http://www.blisteredthumbs.net/our-staff/

Angry Joe is in charge, then you have

UK Content Editor: This is also the first staff position directly below Joes. Do they really need a single person to be the editor of UK Content? What is UK Content? Are they aiming certain topics just to the UK market?

PC Reviews Editor: Well at least this position makes sense

Lead Site Editor: No idea why this would be 3rd on the list, or how they are ordering the list anyway.  But given the number of editors they have (just wait) what’s the point of having someone overseeing the editors who are already editing? If you have a PC game that was only released in the UK for some reason, does it go through the UK editor, PC Reviews Editor and then the Lead Site editor?

Video Producer/Foreign Correspondent: I guess they didn’t need a French Content editor. Ironically, Benzaie might not actually be a “Foreign Correspondent” as the definition of such is someone that sends back news reports from a foreign country. He’s about as foreign to France as the Eiffel Tower.

MMO Review Editor: There’s 2 of these. I realize there’s a lot of MMOs, but are they so popular that one editor couldn’t handle the workload? If you cover an MMO do both people have to approve it?

Xbox/PS3 Review Editor: Why do you need 2 MMO editors, but one editor to cover both the PS3 and Xbox (I’ll guess they mean the 360 here).

Lead Retro Editor: Once again, I must be missing something. Old games, that have been reviewed into the ground get a single editor. But XBox and PS3 get shared.

Lead PSP Reviews Editor: Does anyone care about the PSP? Let’s move on.

News Contributor/Reviews/Editor: Another Editor and then there’s 2 other people that are just News Contributors/Reviews. Some of the few people that aren’t editors. Boo them.

Lead DLC Editor: Seriously? I thought the PSP editor was a joke. But a DLC editor? Here’s every DLC review ever “YOUR BEING RIPPED OFF! YOU EEEEEEEEEEEEDIOT!”

Reviews Editor: Token Chick

News & Culture Contributor, Editor: The culture of video games… This would be the most ridiculous of all of these if it wasn’t for the next position.

Top Lists Specialist/Contributor: Really, your good at “Top Lists”? Go Kill Yourself. I mean somehow this “position” is worse then the 2nd MMO Editor, “Culture Contributor” and DLC Editor. I really am out of words.

I just want to mention that they have a PSP editor. The PSP sold 71 Million units worldwide. The Nintendo DS Sold 151 Million units worldwide. They also don’t have a Wii Editor, despite the Wii outselling the Xbox 360 and PS3 COMBINED. That’s right, the PS3 sold 62 Million and the Xbox 360 sold 65 Million while the Wii sold over 150 Million. But thank god Blistered Thumbs has TWO MMO editors. Stupid is as Stupid does, especially with Angry Joe running things.